Thursday, May 15, 2014

Quiet My Heart

I needed to write this morning.
I've been needing to write for some time now.
But my proposed agenda has been holding me back.
Remember the post?  The last one?  Where I told you where I had been in my absence from this place and all I had learned?  How I detailed the travels and events; the many lessons and trials; the joys and the triumphs? Remember how I told you I would share all of it here with you?  
Remember?
Well, you may not remember, but I do.
And it's been holding me back from writing at all...

Because I thought I needed to follow through on what I said, rather than His plan for this space.

Ugh.

In the meantime, I've been putting aside all of the beauty and wisdom that has floated my way, convinced that my strategy was the right one.
"You have to learn to follow through on what you say you're going to do, Cynthia."
This has been a mantra of mine for the past year, as I have historically flitted from idea to idea, enamored with the prospects and the creativity...not so excited about the hard work it takes to bring the idea to fruition.
Wahn...wahn...wahn...
And, of course, the concept of "follow through" is an important one.

But here?
Well, this space is sacred.
It's not for agendas...plans...schemes...strategies.

This space is an open heart waiting to be filled with His Word.
His grace.
His direction.

Thank you, Jesus, for helping me rediscover that this morning.

So I may get to the lessons from my travels - and I may not.
I may share with you the joys and the tears - and I may not.
I may relive those observations of self and others - and I may not.
And do you know why I can't promise?
Because He's in charge.
He's the guide, the morning star, the compass pointing me to the words.

And His word for me today as I heard it whispered?
"Quiet my heart."
Simple.
Direct.
Necessary.
But, oh, so difficult for a woman like me to "follow through" on.



Friday, May 2, 2014

Lessons from the Road

How in the world did it get to be May?!?  It has been an extremely busy spring for me and mine.  I was shocked to see that I haven't written since mid-March.  To catch you up on "the haps," here's a little timeline of my last few weeks:


  • March 24, packed up all afternoon at a production office in order to travel as script supervisor March 26-April 5 for a Honda Canada national meeting...
  • Had five days catching up and with the family until - 
  • April 11, when I moved into a hotel for another production event, staying until April 19
  • April 20, He was risen indeed as our family celebrated Easter Sunday
  • April 22, had a Disney workshop then started prepping to have...              drumroll please...
  • April 24th surgery!  (Don't worry, I'm fine.)
  • (Recover, recover, heal, recover until today) May 2 when I went back to Disney.
  • Aaaaaannnnnddddd, my daughter just informed me that the countdown to her high school graduation is 41 days!!!!
How has all of this happened?

The great news is that, despite the busy schedule - in fact, often because of it - there were life lessons popping up all along the way for me.  
Things I was proud to see and those I was ashamed to admit...
Observations of myself and others that were both refreshing and convicting...
Qualities I'd like to carry forward and those I'd love to leave far, far behind.

Exhale.

So here's a small preview of those lessons yet to come.
Lessons from the Road #1-6:
  1. Men and women are indeed - in oh, so many ways - different.
  2. There's an unspoken - okay, sometimes spoken - hierarchy in every event, every station, every business in life.  But it's only there because we make it so.
  3. The small acts we of grace we give unknowingly each day always affect someone.
  4. Personal growth and behavior is sometimes impeded by placing ourselves into old situations with old friends.
  5. Chocolate is an amazing marketing tool.
  6. Believing in healing wholly actually speeds healing wholly.
There were more lessons, of course, but these were some of my most profound.  
(Yes, I used chocolate and profound in the same framework.)  
Thanks for sticking with me in my interim posting.  
You are treasured here.  
And I am grateful.