- Ecclesiastes 3:11 (NIV)
There are days when I just cannot comprehend how complicated God's plan is...
How to conceive of the fact that each of our stories was written long before the world began...
And how all of our lives crisscross and intersect in this unbelievable maze of His goodness.
My poor itty-bitty, teeny-weeny muddled brain.
How to understand?
Take yesterday for example.
I arose and shuffled into the living room to pray in my little white chair.
Opening one of my devotionals, "Your Best Life Begins Each Morning,"
I started to read.
Now this book was published and first printed in December of 2008.
Which means that it was written well before then...maybe as early as 2005? 2006?
There is a Scriptural excerpt and short inspirational paragraph for all 365 days of the year.
The author had to heed a beckoning from Him as to where to place each encouraging passage before publishing.
Yesterday's passage date was May 27.
One year ago, on May 27, 2012, my dad left his earthly vessel to start a new life in Heaven.
It was a beautiful, sacred, but sorrowful time for our family.
So you can imagine why I mentioned I was "shuffling" to the living room.
The one year anniversary of Daddy's death hit me much harder that morning than I realized it would.
So picture me and my itty-bitty muddled brain when I began to read from the May 27th passage:
"When my father died back in 1999..."
I couldn't read further.
I put the book down for a moment to stop in wonder, full of awe in His love for me.
In His knowledge that I would need to read something relative to my sorrow on that very morning.
In awareness of the understanding that back in 2005 or 2006, God whispered to the author, "May 27th needs to speak about fathers...about their legacies...about the floundering their children experience once they leave. About how I am behind them. Yes, start May 27 like this, 'When my father died back in 1999...' You don't need to know why. Please just do it. One of my children will need to hear those words eight years from now."
When I composed myself, I went on to read the rest of the passage.
It was about how the author was expected to take up his father's ministry.
How he didn't feel worthy.
How he tried to talk himself out of it.
"I had to decide whether I was going to shrink back into my comfort zone or step out in faith, knowing that Almighty God was on my side."
His ultimate choice was clear or else he wouldn't have written the book.
He stepped out in faith.
And I'm so glad he did.
If not, he wouldn't have heard the incessant whisper on his heart to write the book. And he wouldn't have been urged to place that excerpt on May 27, the very day I needed to read it.
Oh, how my itty-bitty brain wishes to understand.
But, at the same time, how grateful I am that I don't have to worry about my path.
It's been written since long before I was born.
And I'm stepping out in faith, knowing that Almighty God is on my side.
- Thanks for reading today.
In awe of His goodness.