Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Rest, Child

Oh, my favorite daily messages are the ones that assuage my guilt (which is often unreasonable) and let me off the proverbial hook onto which I hang myself so frequently.

Case in point...

My body has been fighting off some kind of infection for the past week.
Sometimes I feel okay.
Sometimes I feel a bit under.
And then there are the days, like yesterday, that it hit me rather hard.
Shivering under a blanket (it was 77 degrees in the house),
terrible migraine...
all in all, a mess.

I took some NyQuil and hit the hay at 9:30PM.
When I awoke at 6:50, I knew it was not over.
God bless my beautiful husband who told me to stay in bed while he took it upon himself to do all of the myriad chores and daily preparations that I usually do myself.
He's such a lovely spirit...I knew he was doing all of this out of concern for me and my health, and doing it unconditionally.
Yet there I lie, beating myself up for not jumping out of bed to take care of all of it myself.

When did we get to a place in our culture that we beat ourselves up for being sick?
Ugh...that in itself is a sickness.

Anyway, the family went off to their respective experiences and I got up an hour later...
Still feeling guilty...
Still feeling "less"...
Still being hard on myself.

I stopped at my usual spot to read my devotionals, wrapped in a blanket and shivering, but wondering what the Lord had in store for this quiet day of healing.

"Lie down in green pastures of peace...I built into your very being the need for rest. How twisted the world has become when people feel guilty about meeting this basic need!"

Sobbing...

Oh, thank You, Lord, my caregiver, my rest, my inner Peace.
Thank you for alleviating my unnecessary self-reproach.
Thank you for soothing me with the balm of Your assurance.
Thank you for harboring my spirit when it is ill and in need of healing.
Thank you for supporting my need to rest in body and in You.


{How do you need to rest today?
Forgive yourself?
Lower unreasonable expectations?
Rest in Him.}

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