At Braden's middle school with some of the faculty, Drew and I are experiencing a difference of goals in regards to Brae's diabetic care. We are so grateful Braden is finally becoming independent in his medical care and want the teachers and school administration to be on board in supporting this effort. It has been a long road - one fraught with insecurity, ostricization, and embarassment on the part of our boy. We really feel he is starting to turn a corner and want this positive momentum to continue. I was discussing with my sister, a speech pathologist and teacher of little ones, the fact that I might need to call a meeting with all of the players to get us all on the same page.
As I was thinking about bullet points for this meeting, I prayed, "God, thank you for equipping me with the skills necessary to handle this type of issue. Please always help me to be an effective advocate for my son. And PLEASE give me the right words and the right attitude when the time comes." (I tend to be a bit of a hothead.) I started thinking about the events that led me and my family to this place in time and how we all ended up together. How does God know which person to give to whom? It amazes me.
A few months ago, I was sharing with my girlfriends that I was so happy that the challenges I have are manageable to me and that I'm not faced with certain other challenges that I don't think I could handle. "Like what?" they wanted to know. "Anything bloody, oozing, amputations, dressings that need changing. I know it sounds ridiculous but I don't think I could stomach it. I get really queasy." I have been known to go green and have to exit the room at Braden's routine blood draws. They replied, "Then that won't happen to you because God knows it's more than you can bear." My daughter, Colleen, currently wants to be a surgeon. I can't conceive of having chosen that path. I am so admiring of anyone who makes a commitment of that caliber. I can just imagine myself in surgery giving instructions to the nurse...
"Clamp..." (to clip my lips together to keep from making gagging noises)
"Pan..." (to throw up in over my shoulder)
Heaven forbid I should have to ask for an electric saw or rib spreaders! They'd have to mop me off the floor along with the patients' bodily fluids!!
No, God gave me what He knew I could handle. A boy with social challenges but a giving heart. A boy with learning roadblocks but a hilarious sense of humor. A boy with a non-working pancreas but a productive mind. A boy with whom I can talk and laugh and listen and share and care for as God shows me along the way. A boy who will overcome these challenges and be a successful, contributing member of our greater world. A boy whose path has been carved out for him by his Father who loves him and has him in His care.
No, doctoring is out - but mothering is in. And I believe myself to be the luckiest woman in the world that I have been called to do just that.